Uphill

One of the overwhelming ailments in our world is anxiety in its many variants. Below are a few powerful facts about how anxiety affects the lives of many of the people we love:

• Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18.1% of the population every year.
• Anxiety disorders are highly treatable, yet only 36.9% of those suffering receive treatment.
• People with an anxiety disorder are three to five times more likely to go to the doctor and six times more likely to be hospitalized for psychiatric disorders than those who do not suffer from anxiety disorders.
• Anxiety disorders develop from a complex set of risk factors, including genetics, brain chemistry, personality, and life events.

These numbers are especially disturbing when we realize this is definitely an issue that attacks young people.

Loving someone with a mental health disorder, addiction or both is not easy, it is a constant ride on a non-stop wild mouse roller coaster with few laughs and smiles.

When I remember the last 5 or 6 years of LaLa’s (my daughter Lauren) life, there are many happy and fulfilling moments as there were throughout all her life. One particularly special event was when I got to share with her one of my life-long dreams to visit a place, the Cloisters in NYC, that seeing a picture of way back in the 70’s inspired me to pursue photography. It was very special for me to be able to share that experience with her. You can read about the day in one of last year’s posts entitled “A Day I Will Never Forget”. Others were the many times we enjoyed baking together on Friday nights, the post called “You have to Be Willing to Compete” talks about that fun and “filling” time.  We also got to enjoy many times skiing together.

The most difficult memories I have are the ones where Laurens battles with anxiety overwhelmed her. Many are heartbreaking, some I will most likely never share out of respect for Lauren. It is difficult to see someone you love completely broken and know that in that moment there is nothing you can do. On one of those occasions Lauren was so overcome with anxiety she begged me to make the decision for her of where she should go for treatment of her anorexia. I know it was a struggle for her to do that and it took great effort at that moment on her part. You can read more about that moment here . Anxiety is very real, very powerful and an epidemic problem in our culture today.

This past week I came across an article called “10 Reasons Teens Have So Much Anxiety Today”  by Amy Morin.

In the article, she covers how our world and our parenting style affects our children. The article is well worth the read.

The 10 items she mentions are:

1. Electronics offer an unhealthy escape.
2. Happiness is all the rage.
3. Parents are giving unrealistic praise.
4. Parents are getting caught up in the rat race.
5. Kids aren’t learning emotional skills.
6. Parents view themselves as protectors rather than guides.
7. Adults don’t know to help kids face their fears the right way.
8. Parents are parenting out of guilt and fear.
9. Kids aren’t being given enough free time to play.
10. Family hierarchies are out of whack.

I would have to confess that some of these showed up in my parenting especially number 8. I also find number 10 very interesting as I observe where families are heading today. This article is to the point, informative and well worth the few minute read.

The article reminds us that we need to teach our children that life is many times an uphill struggle, and that is normal.

In my life I have physically, often reluctantly, walked up hills. My doctor tells me it’s good for me. Although I don’t always want to acknowledge his advice, the statement is true, and the same is true to life in general. Overcoming addiction and mental health is an uphill struggle, but it can be done. An interesting thing I have come to realize is that when I walk up hills physically, it always seems easier when someone is walking with me. Don’t let your loved one fight the uphill battle alone, walk with them.

Todays featured image is by Brooke Shaden, it is entitled “Uphill”